More on the scanners...

...because it clearly has lit a fire in my belly. I'm angry that the government has legalized sexual assault for themselves. I'm terrified of how I may actually respond in the situation. I live in a city that has been promised scanners, so it's a real fear, not a what-if-someday.

When the Patriot Act was first enacted I was alone in my complaining. I could see the rights slipping away. I knew it was only the beginning. I grumbled to myself because no one would listen. All I heard was, "Well, it's the price of safety." What safety?! Before, I was afraid of the terrorists and the criminals, those who wished me harm. Now, I'm afraid of the terrorists, the criminals, and the government, those who wish me harm and those who say they're here to protect me. Why don't I feel protected? Why do I feel violated?

There are those who are saying that the ones who are complaining are those who are demanding they be kept safe. Oh, really? I beg to differ. That may be true in some cases, but not mine. "They" say that if something happened, then those same people who complained would blame Obama. Why?! Why not place the blame squarely where it belongs, on the terrorists!

I don't expect anyone to protect me. No one. Because I know no one will. I KNOW IT! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. So, I can live in fear that something will happen, but why? It already has! What's the point? Or, I can live my life as fully as I am able.

For those who are rolling theirs eyes and thinking, yea, but it's different when it really happens. I already know. I had my tickets and all my plans to go to Europe. My departure was only a few days away, and the U.S. bombed Libya. Every single person I knew who had plans to go to Europe cancelled. Everyone expected me to cancel my plans. It wasn't safe. Libya promised retaliation. I knew England was a whole lot closer than America. I knew the risk was high.

All I could think was that this was my chance to go, and if I died, so be it. My chances of dying in a car accident are far higher. I could be struck by lightening! I could be hit crossing a street. I could be shot by lunatics out target practicing on people. I could fall down a flight of stairs. The possibilities are endless. We are all going to die. No one is getting out of this world alive.

So, do I live in fear, quaking in my boots, whining for someone to protect me, or do I step out boldly (shaking in my boots) and LIVE. I went to Europe. IT WAS FANTASTIC!! I loved it! I had the place practically to myself, and everyone was so thrilled I came and begged me to tell everyone when I returned home that it was safe so they'd visit.

In fact, I extended my trip. The original plan was to stay for six weeks. I added another eight weeks, despite the fact that shortly after I arrived, Chernobyl happened. God bless those souls. I wanted to see Holland and France; I had friends there. My friends in England discouraged me from going because of the cloud of radiation spreading across Eastern Europe. It wasn't safe. I watched, and again decided, if I die, so be it.

I went to Holland and France, and LOVED IT! The whole trip was worth every single moment. My only regret was that I didn't take my uncle's offer to arrange for a green card and stay longer. But God had other plans for me that I felt I should follow. I was blessed with the trip of a lifetime. Because I refused to live in fear of things beyond my control.

All that being said, I've also been watching how others are handling this. I cannot bring myself to blame the TSA agents who are doing their job. I know myself well enough to realize that though I'll spout everything I'd like to do, I wouldn't. It's like when your little brother eats the last piece of cake and you swear you're going to kill him. Everyone knows you're not. It's a way to release the frustration, hurt, and anger without doing serious damage. I have seen some humorous approaches that I quite like. Hopefully, I will not need to ever face this nightmare, but if I do, I pray I handle it with grace and kindness. God works in mysterious ways His wonders to perform. If I calm myself, He will inspire answers I never would have imagined on my own.

Now, the choice is mine: Allow myself to wallow in anger or allow myself to seek God's inspiration. What will you choose?