Rainy Days and Mondays...

...don't actually get me down, though I do love the Carpenters' song by the same title. Instead, being able to use the title is a reason to celebrate! It's raining! Again! Not a common occurrence here. So, what to do to celebrate? I'm curling up with a book. Oh, wait, I do that all the time, but hey, now I'm doing it because it's the perfect occasion! There was a time, not so long ago, when I would have said it was time to bake cookies. Now, I'll put some cinnamon in the trash cans and make myself something healthy... like a grilled cheese sandwich. Hey! It's wheat and milk! So, today is going to be a bit of fluff. Everyone needs a little fluff in their life. I'll be more serious tomorrow. And no, I do not like Scarlet O'Hara. The woman needed some serious counseling. Talk about unhealthy.

I was thinking of listing other things I enjoy, but I fear this post would go on for ever, so I'm focusing on music I love. What is currently in my CD player, which also happens to be my alarm clock, includes the Christian album I Can Only Imagine, Rick Astley's Whenever You Need Somebody, and Donny Osmond's This Is The Moment. What I'll be listening to next is The Lord of the Rings soundtracks. Then I'll be popping in some Josh Groban. I recently changed out some Dan Fogelberg. In the wings waiting for a replay are Ladyhawke, Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Neil Diamond, and the Phantom of the Opera with Gerard Butler.

I suppose the collection would lead to my Pandora stations that include Christmas, Gaelic, Styx, Yanni, Rick Brickman, Donny, and I hope You Dance. I always thought my tastes pretty eclectic, until a professional musician listened to me rattle off my likes and informed me I was very middle of the road. How boring is that? Sort of like being Jack of all Trades and Master of None. Predictable. Who wants to be predictable?

So I tried some other styles. You know what? Middle of the road isn't bad. It still leaves me plenty to explore and still have fun. Predictable? Maybe, but I've lived with unpredictable, and I've decided that predictable definitely has a lot of benefits and isn't a bad thing at all. And I've finally realized that the problem wasn't what they were saying about me, but what I felt about myself. I wanted to be liked, and was willing to sacrifice myself to achieve that end, which meant I ended up not only not liking myself but actually not really knowing who I was anymore.

It's been a long, brutal, grueling road, but I am actually finding myself again, and more importantly I think I actually like myself. This is the great adventure of life: To find out who we are and to be the best possible self.