Rethinking how I think about my body...

The following link was posted on FB:

http://www.rolereboot.org/life/details/2013-06-when-your-mother-says-shes-fat

I'm not a mother. My mother didn't say those things about herself; she did say them about me, even though I wasn't fat. Example: "Men don't marry girls who weigh as much as you do." I look at the pictures of my much younger self and stare. I was perfectly proportioned. The perfect hourglass. Really. Curvy the way a woman should be curvy. Soft the way a woman should be soft, with nothing extra. I bought clothes off the rack, and they fit perfectly, except jeans/slacks/trousers, which never fit properly. They either fit in the hip and were too big in the waist, or they fit in the waist but were too tight in the hips. I didn't appreciate my body because I was told it was bad.

Now, I know better.

I'll never be that shape again. I'm sad for me. I'm sad for my body.

I'm even sadder that I've punished my body for not meeting impossible expectations.

I was trained well. If I liked a particular dish, it was changed until I didn't like it. I'm able to recognize now it was to stop me from eating.

Food is necessary for life.

I am worth feeding. Starvation is not being kind to me. Trying to eat like "the experts" advise is not being kind to me. I'm smart. I know what is healthy and what isn't. I sometimes make unhealthy choices. This does not make me stupid or bad. I make a lot of healthy choices. This is also not something to celebrate, doing so gives it too much "weight." :-) It's common sense.

Food is a God-given blessing.

I was taught to curse the food that sustains me. How messed up is that?

I'm working to learn to appreciate all my blessings, including food. God created some truly amazing goodies.

Maybe I need to try gratitude: Instead of lamenting my weight, I need to thank God for every delicious bite. It doesn't cost me anything... except a change in my thinking.

So it begins...