Friday, September 2, 2011

Laughter is good...



M&M Duels as found at Stumble Upon (Use the link or keep reading.)

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/6wv756/bl.net/forwards/mnms.html

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one.

Brought to you by http://BL.net/

And another fun kitty picture, because... a picture is worth 1,000 words...

6 comments:

  1. That is absolutely hysterical. I will never look at an M&M in the same way again.

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  2. :-) My work here is done. LOL!

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  3. Love the pictures. M&M testing may become a new vocation.

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  4. I wonder if that method would work with Peanut M&Ms...

    :-D

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  5. It might be worth trying... it would be yummy, anyway. :-D

    ReplyDelete

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