Restoring Courage 8-24-11 Jerusalem

I can't attend the gathering in Israel. Money is a little tight. But I want to prepare as if I were going to be there. I've been thinking about what I am grateful for that Israel has given me. Jesus Christ, my Savior. The Bible, the Word of God, was written by the Jews. The center of my life was given to me by the Jews. One of my nieces mentioned wanting to be better about reading her Scriptures, every day. I decided to take a page from her book. Last night, I started reading The Bible, again. I've read it through several times, but it's been a while. Now seemed like a good time to start. As I read about the Creation and Adam and Eve, I had a very different experience. All my life, I have looked upon that question and answer conversation between God and Adam and Eve as an interrogation and chastisement. I could imagine how disappointed God was in the couple's disobedience, and how it would sound. Not so this time.

Several years ago, I embraced what I call the Abraham and Isaac principle. God commands Abraham to sacrifice Isaac. Abraham was not young. Isaac was not a little boy. Isaac could have overcome his father. He chose to obey, and allow himself to be sacrificed. Abraham was prepared to carry out the command, but at the last moment God stayed Abraham's hand. Why? Why would God command someone to do something, and then hold them back from fulfilling that command, at the last moment? It seems almost as if God is being wishy-washy. He isn't.

I remind myself that God is all knowing. Did God need Abraham and Isaac to prove to Him that they would be obedient? Why? He already knew what they would do. With that thought in mind, it occurred to me that Abraham and Isaac needed to know that they would do. Would they be obedient to God's command, especially when it was as difficult as they could imagine? They served as a witness to each other that they were willing to be obedient. So why would God need to ask Adam and Eve what they were doing, if He already knew?

My perspective changed. God knew what they would do, so why would He be angry? Perhaps instead He was saddened, knowing how hard it would be, like any parent sending their children out into the world, who knows they cannot protect their precious children from all that will befall them. It seemed in my reading of the events, this time, that God asked them each questions with the express purpose of making sure that Adam and Eve understood and recognized what they had done and would be unable to dispute the consequences. Then He warned them about how hard it would be for them. Be careful, my child.

I saw it again, when Cain slay Abel. God knew what had happened. He asked questions that required Cain to admit the truth, and was unable to dispute the consequences. He complained, but he couldn't claim he didn't know what he'd done was wrong.

For a lot of years, I kept questions, on both sides, to a minimum, because I was afraid of the answers. I tried re-wording the questions, but in my heart of hearts, I knew I was playing a game. I knew the root of the question. God knew, too. In the last few years, I knew I had to change. I started by keeping my prayers pretty exclusive to immediate problems and praying for others. As I've grown in my confidence to recognize the difference between me answering my own prayers to have the answer I want (that doesn't turn out well) and recognizing God's gentle nudges, I've endeavored to release the questions of the past. Instead, I'm searching to find different questions to ask, questions that are pertinent to who I have become. I did keep it pretty one-sided, for a time, because I was afraid of falling into old habits of asking for what I think I want instead of what I truly need. In the last year or so, I've started to open my heart to God's questions. At the center is one all-encompassing question: Will you trust Me? I think I'm finally able to answer: Yes.