Am I jinxed? I'm sorting through papers, today. I unearthed one of my notes to myself about the cost of a house, including all the little things like taxes, utilities, etc. Every single time I start making plans, by saving, to buy a house, something happens with my job, and I'm living off those savings.
I don't know why I'm feeling so scattered, but I am.
Saved a spider, today. Rescued it from the doomed front bath, where there are no bugs for it to eat. A cup, a piece of paper, and nerves of steel, and the creepy crawly is now back outside, where it belongs.
Spent several hours working on assignments from online classes.
Finished reading the first book for Kris Tualla, and will start the second. Under a timeline; I'm not worried about completing the task on time. She has some amazing turns of phrase.
Worked on a couple of other projects, as well.
Reading a couple of books by authors new to me. I'm still reading The Warrior Elite. I'm trying to own better health, which starts with eating better and finding exercise I actually enjoy. The SEAL puppy reps are kind of fun, because I can actually do them.
Today, someone gushed to me about this book they were reading called "The Obesity Myth." I was quite proud of myself for successfully refraining from screaming: "I would weigh less, if I weren't trying to hide from insensitive I-know-what-you-need-if-you-would-listen-to-me types." *pfft* Actually, I took a look at it, over at Amazon, and there isn't anything there I didn't already know from reading it in various articles. The book was published in 2004. I hope the person who recommended it takes it to heart and benefits from it.
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Anne Baldwin married Samuel Chase in 1762. Thought she bore six children, two sons and four daughters, she didn't live long enough to se...
Hmm, I would find it less critical of a person who was overweight to be giving advice about weight-loss. I would be more likely to be insulted, however, if the person giving the advice was very thin. That would just feel hurtful because it's like they are saying, "Don't you want to be skinny, like me?" which puts you, in their mind, on the boat of comparison...and that's not fair.
ReplyDeleteWhen I see people who are overweight, I don't say anything to them about it unless they ASK for advice or my thoughts. And in those cases, what do I really know anyway? I'm not a physician, or a therapist, so I'm not really qualified to discuss the matter.
I get that people who make mention of weight-loss to you are usually well-meaning individuals...but for me, it just comes down to this: Did Judy ask for advice/thoughts/concerns? If she didn't, then shush!
Another issue I take up is when it's a stranger who feels obligated to make the comments. On some level, I can understand a very close loved one (a spouse/boyfriend or children, perhaps) making kind suggestions in relation to their concerns for the person's health. Other than that though, it's just no one else's business.
It seems people do this to you often. It makes me angry! I can only imagine how it makes you feel!
Thanks ((Jonsi)) What an unexpectedly thought-provoking comment. I'm not so sure people who give me unsolicited advice are truly well-meaning. Without knowing my situation, let alone asking about it, they are assuming that they know what's best for me. They aren't really trying to help me but instead are promoting themselves as the person who can fix me. Then again, the weight problem is an incredibly touchy aspect of my life. I suppose what annoys me is that it seems to be assumed that because I'm overweight, then I must never do any research on my own. I think even more annoying is the sense that they must think I'm incredibly stupid. Yes, I know I have trouble with my weight, and guess what? I even know why, and I know what I need to do help myself, and guess what? I'm actually working on it. If there were a magic pill to make it all better, I'd know about it. I work for a bariatric specialist, so I have the inside track. These people would probably be surprised by what they'd learn if they asked me what I know. Yep, it drives me crazy.
ReplyDeletewow yeah that is annoying. thats like my 'rational' friend telling me to be more 'rational' like her which just came off as extremely frustrating and unsympathetic. i don't understand the whole weight thing, like if someone is fat, i dont see any difference between them and me, i just assume that well yes obviously they are fat and obviously they know all about that, i mean, it's THEM and their lives. i see it as just one aspect of the person and wonder about their relationship with this. do i feel lucky that i'm not fat? no. i have a billion other problems. i'm sure being fat to them is just some other thing that they have some relationship with. i mean, i don't know a single thing about what they really want and who they are underneath all that, if they want to get rid of the fat. THEY have all the answers about that. just cause youre fat doesn't mean youre not happy. maybe they like being fat and aren't trying to get rid of it. who is to assume? i'd care more about how they're feeling than how they look. i find it very odd that someone would judge you and disapprove of your fat, like somehow it's a hinderance to them.
ReplyDeleteOkay, that last sentence really made me laugh out loud! That is exactly how it comes across. It is somehow a failure for them, if they can't "straighten" out my problems. Funnier still is that for me the weight would come off, if they would simply leave me alone regarding it. I'm more apt to gain weight when they say something. The imp in me says, "So there." *pfft* Then, I remind myself that I'm a grown up, and I keep trying to do better without their unhelpful input.
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